It's lucky I can't see far with this leg!

I've missed Kira and Frantz, and I could not believe what a change a few months has brought to Kira. She likes me now. She never really liked me before. She tolerated me more than others, but that was the extent of her appreciation of all my hard work. But now, she's verbal, she's affectionate, she's interested in more than just her mother's boob. I'm all for extended breastfeeding, but it makes it hard on the babysitter. She's still nursing, but she can stand to be seperated for big chunks of time. I'm hoping to take her to the Poet's Walk tomorrow morning. But I have a meeting at 12:30, so I don't know how long I'll be able to stay. I was also going to try to give blood, but I might not have time unless I give really early in the morning.
I got paid yesterday, so I went and got a CD player and a new watch, and I signed up for an Itunes account, ordered 11 of the saddest country songs in the world, so now I never have to sit through country music radio waiting for one of these 11 songs to come on. They are all songs that make me cry.

1. The Georgia Rain--(Tricia Yearwood) beautiful melody and it reminds me of home
"...screen door flapping in the wind
same old house I grew up in..."

2. Concrete Angel (Martina McBride...childhood trauma song #1) About a little girl who get killed by her abusive father
"a statue stands in a shady place
an angel girl with an upturned face
a name is written on a polished rock
a broken heart that the world forgot"

3. Tears in the Floor of Heaven (somebody, I forgot...they're all the same) about all these people that die and look down on the people they love...VERY SAD
"Mama smiled, said "don't be sad, child...
grandma's watching you today
cuz their holes in the floor of heaven,
and her tears are falling down.."

4. 10000 miles (Mary Chapin Carpenter)...perhaps the most moving song I've ever heard...musically more than lyrically, from the credits of Fly Away Home.
"The rocks may melt and the sea's may burn
if I should not return
oh don't you see that lonesome dove
sitting on an ivy tree
she's weeping for her own true love
as I shall weep for mine."

5. Everything I own (Bread) This song reminds me of my childhood. I can't be certain but it sounds a lot like something Mama used to sing.
"I would give anything I own
give up my life, my heart, my home..."

6. Walk A Little Straighter (childhood trauma #2) about a boy with an alcholic father

walk a little straighter, daddy,
you're swaying side to side,
your footsteps make me dizzy,
and no matter how I try,
I keep tripping and stumbling,
if you looked down here you'd see,
walk a little straighter, daddy, you're leading me

7. I Love You This Much (childhood trauma #3) about a boy whose father never loved him, no matter how much he tried, who finds Jesus. I'm shameless.

"He said, 'damn you daddy', the day that he died
The man didn't blink, but the little boy cried
'I love you this much, and I'm waiting on you,
to make up your mind, do you love me too,
how ever long it takes, I'm never giving up,
no matter what, I love you this much'"

8. Whiskey Lullaby (Alison Krauss) unrequited love, self-destruction, Alison Krauss...deadly combination.
"He put that bottle to his head, and pulled the trigger
and finally drank away her memory.
Life is short, but this time it was bigger
than the strength he had to get up off his knees"

9. On the Backseat of a Greyhound Bus (Sara Evans) pregnant teen who gives birth on a greyhound
"on the backseat of a greyhound bus,
heart so full that it could bust,
staring at the rest of her life,
she never thought this would be the place
where she would find her saving grace
but she fell in love on the backseat of a greyhound bus"

10. Come Home Soon (SheDaisy) story about a woman waiting for her husband to come home from war...I really am awful. This has blatant patriotic undertones, and I still love it. It makes me wish we were doing the good, noble thing.
"I sleep alone
I cry alone
and it's so hard living here on my own"

11. Skin (Rascal Flatts) Oh my god, this song is sooooo sad. It's about a teenage girl who gets cancer and loses all her hair and her prom date shows up at the door with a shaved head so that they can look the same. SOB!
"Sarah Beth is scared to death
As she sits holding her mom
Cause it would be a mistake
For someone to take
A girl with no hair to the prom
For, just this morning right there on her pillow
Was the cruellest of any surprise
And she cried when she gathered it all in her hands
The proof that she couldn't deny"

and then later

It's quarter to seven
That boy's at the door
And her daddy ushers him in
And when he takes off his cap
They all start to cry
Cause this morning where his hair had been
Softly, she touches just skin