I Netflixed this yesterday and watched it last night and this afternoon (it was a sharing kind of movie). I just can't seem to shake it out of my mind, not even because it resonated with my life that strongly, but because it was so beautiful and clean and real. The acting was just phenomenal and the writing was exquisite...just candy. And I can't even quite pinpoint what it was about, you know, really about. Loving someone and not knowing what to call it. Working hard to get to some place and not knowing why. Getting to that place and then not having it be what you thought it would be. Doing something your whole life and realizing that it hasn't made you whole. Learning that those we adore are only human. Frailty. I can't seem to be able to call it something, but it was really powerful.
It was also a fairly emotionally complex movie. Because the central figure (who we love)is, quite simply put, a pervert. He is a loving, sweet, complicated, funny, beautiful man who also happens to discreetly fondle his 17 year old male students on the back of his motorbike. How are we to reconcile that? This is abhorrent, is it not? And it's not even something to be made light of. But I didn't really care. I forgave him with heart and soul. I cried for his frailty and sadness. I'm not sure how I feel about that.
There is also something I really love about movies adapted from plays, or movies that feel like they are adapted from plays for that matter. John Sayles's movies always feel a little playish. I guess this is because his words are so important. He's just not as concerned about making a visually pleasing film (though he does so well) as with his subject matter and the way his characters talk to each other. I guess what a lot of people appreciate about film is that it takes the viewer into an authentic, believable alternative reality. Films where the writing demands you to be aware of its presence separate from the visual, might seem to lack subtlety or continuity, but I don't know if I'd agree at all. I guess I like to feel and recognize the creator's hand. I like it.
I wish I could see some good theater. I know I should have taken advantage of NY more when I was there, but I was too poor, and even when I wasn't too poor, I was too tired.
I find myself missing certain things about the city now that I am free of it. I miss spending hours in the NYPL (secret, you can get Bryant Park's wireless from the new Map Division room), going to see every movie at Lincoln Plaza Cinema, prancing down to the Strand every time I felt lonely and running down the balance on J's gift card, sitting in on lectures at the Graduate Center on Wednesday nights...
